A coworker of mine, an older woman with a type-A personality, told me after a few months of working with me that at first glance, she did not believe we would get along well. She noted that I carrying myself as quite intimidating, commanding and opinionated at my interview, and she anticipated us butting heads often. Surprisingly, she believes we get along quite well because we are so headstrong and dedicated to our work, but we also care about the success of our team as a whole. She pointed our that I am a very "real" person as opposed to someone who tries to appease everyone, though she correctly thumbed my StrengthsQuest dominant personality as a "Woo" long before I took the Clifton StrengthsFinder personality test:
Woo stands for winning others over. You enjoy the challenge of meeting new people and getting them to like you. Strangers are rarely intimidating to you. On the contrary, strangers can be energizing. You are drawn to them. You want to learn their names, ask them questions, and find some area of common interest so that you can strike up a conversation and build rapport. Some people shy away from starting up conversations because they worry about running out of things to say. You don't. Not only are you rarely at a loss for words; you actually enjoy initiating with strangers because you derive satisfaction from breaking the ice and making a connection.
However, from another lens (one of a supervisee), I initially came off as very fake. She noted that I initially seemed too happy for my attitude to be genuine, and that I consciously tried to be a friend to everyone (which is sort of what I do, as a pegged "woo"). However, after a while, she realized that I had just as many emotions as is the norm, and that my attitude was apt to the situation.
From my standpoint, I criticize myself for being "too real". I have a difficult time hiding my disenchantment for people. When someone insults or offends me, I let them know immediately. I do not go around people to get issues solved - I am pretty predictable about working my way up the ladder. I do, however, make sure I have an outline of my perspective, along with examples and supporting persons, before I move forward with any action.
Deborah Gruenfeld (2013), professor at the Stanford Graduate School of Business, states that most people, when preparing for a situation where they want to have influence, think about what they are going to say. Instead of thinking solely about what we are going to say, we should also think about what our body is telling people. This is because when people are forming an impression of us, what we say only accounts for seven percent of what they come away with. There is a body language of power. We learn how to show confidence, show compassion and care, and how to be intimidating, through stances, eye contact, and arm movement. In utilizing power and influence, we must be authoritative and approachable. It pays to be authoritative, as people need to know you are confident in your ability to make decisions, as well as directive and able to privilege your knowledge and experience over the knowledge and experience of others. However, being approachable balances this out - authoritative people are rarely seen as empathetic - as it shows openness and the ability to relate to others. Being able to balance both is the basis of managerial likability, which is important in being an effective leader.
Power involves
the capacity of one party (the "agent") to influence another party (the "target"). An agent may have influence over a single or over multiple target persons. Power comes in many forms, yet French and Raven note them in fives specific types: reward power, coercive power, legitimate power, expert power and referent power (Yukl, 2010). Legitimate, reward and coercive power have one large setback: these positional power structures are easily abused. This abuse involves a manager believing that they are the center of everything, that they know all, and are oblivious to the indirect verbal and nonverbal feedback from employees (Messina, 2008). In the long run this type of behavior leads to the abuser feeling lonely and disconnected from others, constantly feeling the need to defend themselves from others, and employee resentment will ultimately result in opponents and competitors working to bring down the power person (McGinty, 2001).
Watts Humphrey, author of the best-selling and influential book, Managing The Software Process (1989)
and director of the Software Process Program at Carnegie Mellon noted in his failures of and early management experience, "we had to resort to power because our authority had broken down." Therefore, though power is important, to solely rely on it for influence is detrimental to the work environment and ultimately to the person. However, personal power - the ability to exert
influence in an organization beyond the
authority granted through position - is exuded in expert power and referential power. This
type of power may include job knowledge,
interpersonal skills, ability to get
results, empathetic abilities, or persuasive
abilities (Yukl, 2010) So what are authoritarians doing that works?
Those in authoritative positions appear relaxed and open. They walk in long strides, taking up space and owning their presence. Because at the top of the hierarchy, they have very little to worry about; it is presumed that everyone beneath them is going to make sure that nothing bad ever happens. Fracaro calls this attitude and form of communication "Language from the Center," (2008) which involves
taking the lead and projects competence
and confidence, resulting in the building of
trust. Their trust does not waiver in discipline or making tough decisions. They stare people down when they are addressing them, but when being addressed, may break gaze and wonder in their thoughts. They do not have to say much, but what they do say has a clear beginning and clear end point. Doing these things is a sign of dominance, and people tend to lean with the ideas of those who command themselves as the deciding factor (Gruenfeld, 2013).
Influence in one direction tends to enhance influence in other directions (Yukl, 2010). It is intriguing to see how this plays out in a room of leaders being addressed by their own leader, then in another room where one of these leaders is heading their own group of workers. Those in approachable positions are much the opposite of those in authoritative positions. Fracaro calls this attitude and form of communication "Language from the Edge" (2008) and is collaborative and responsive in nature. Gruenfeld (2013) notes that approachable people appear small and try to minimize their imprint. They use fleeting and jerking movements when speaking to someone (but are focused on the person speaking to them), use their hands close to their faces when they speak, and glance instead of making eye contact. They smile a lot in order to make others (particularly those above them) feel comfortable. However, what may be seen as cowering, Gruenfeld believes is the basis of building rapport, as it shows that one understands their role as an inferior and the role of their superior. However, this is also used by supervisors towards supervisees when giving employees increased responsibility and latitude in how to perform their jobs, and in situations when there are concerns from inferiors. When someone who is obviously of high ranking status "plays low," as Gruenfeld calls it, their reputation is boosted, as it shows respect and acknowledges importance in the multifaceted identity of all workers.
References
Fracaro, Kenneth E. (2008). You're a Manager, but are You a Leader?
Contract Management. Accessed at https://www.ncmahq.org/files/Articles/CM1008%20-%20Professional%20Development.pdf
Gruenfeld, Deborah. (2013). Stanford Graduate School of Business. Accessed at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KdQHAeAnHmwHumphrey, Watts (1989). Managing the Softivare Process, 1st ed.; reprinted with corrections August 1990. Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley.
McGinty, Sarah. (2001). Power Talk: Using Language to Build Authority and Influence. New York, NY: Warner Books.
Messina, James J. (2008). Eliminating Intimidation. Livestrong. Accessed at http://www.livestrong.com/article/14742-eliminating-intimidation/
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